(His heart beats quickly, anxious and worked up with so much energy like it could just burst at any moment. Even if Hizen himself is stunned and still, it's his heart that betrays him. It's always the heart. It's always that thing that feels the most and overwhelmed them all when they were first summoned.)
Norimune-- (He hasn't talked. Norimune has been patient and good to Hizen, not pressing when he arrived at his doorstep and asked to stay. There'd be a teasing quip to let him know it was fine and Norimune had left Hizen to process and cope on his own.) He didn't...
(And his breath catches. He hiccups and his throat feels tight. He brings one hand up to loosen the bandages around it as if that will relieve some of the pressure but he knows this feeling. He felt it when Izo told him to leave. He felt it when Ryouma told him to be quiet. He'd felt it when he spoke to Shylock behind his bar in the early parts of the turf war. He knows this feeling but doesn't at the same time.
He thinks about what Shylock asked. Does he want to cry? He doesn't know. He's never cried before. He's seen people cry before, he knows what it's like but... he's never...)
I don't... (His voice shakes and his tongue trips over itself.) I'm not good. I'm not.
That's why... (He blinks. What's wrong with his eyes? He feels like he's tunneling and everything is so blurry--) Everyone... (He breathes,) Why no one really... wants me.
no subject
Norimune-- (He hasn't talked. Norimune has been patient and good to Hizen, not pressing when he arrived at his doorstep and asked to stay. There'd be a teasing quip to let him know it was fine and Norimune had left Hizen to process and cope on his own.) He didn't...
(And his breath catches. He hiccups and his throat feels tight. He brings one hand up to loosen the bandages around it as if that will relieve some of the pressure but he knows this feeling. He felt it when Izo told him to leave. He felt it when Ryouma told him to be quiet. He'd felt it when he spoke to Shylock behind his bar in the early parts of the turf war. He knows this feeling but doesn't at the same time.
He thinks about what Shylock asked. Does he want to cry? He doesn't know. He's never cried before. He's seen people cry before, he knows what it's like but... he's never...)
I don't... (His voice shakes and his tongue trips over itself.) I'm not good. I'm not.
That's why... (He blinks. What's wrong with his eyes? He feels like he's tunneling and everything is so blurry--) Everyone... (He breathes,) Why no one really... wants me.